My Connections to Play

Play, while it cannot change the external realities of children’s lives, can be a vehicle for children to explore and enjoy their differences and similarities and to create, even for a brief time, a more just world where everyone is an equal and valued participant.

Patricia G. Ramsey
Contemporary American educational psychologist

Children need the freedom and time to play. Play is not a luxury. Play is a necessity.

Kay Redfield Jamison
Contemporary American professor of psychiatry

Creative play is like a spring that bubbles up from deep within a child.

Joan Almon
Contemporary American educator

          I am dating myself when I talk about play for me as a young child.  I was fortunate enough to live in a neighborhood where there were a lot of children.  When I was really young (3-5), I played closer to the house, but my two best friends lived two and four houses away.  I was free to go to those homes whenever I wanted as long as I told my mom first.  
 As I got a little older, I was free to go anywhere in the neighborhood.  After breakfast I would go outside to play and not come in again until my mom called me for lunch.  There was a creek that ran behind our home that we would play in when it was warm enough.  There were woods behind the creek.  We would play in the woods for hours.  Our dads together built us a tree house in one of the trees.  It was three stories tall.  They put old furniture in it.    Our dads also hung some swings from trees where there were openings in the woods.  We also made pine tag forts.  We went bike riding for hours on end.  There was a huge field two doors down from our home.  We would play ball or different forms of tag there.  We played hopscotch and jumped rope on the dead end section of the road near our home.  There was a farm beyond that.  Geese, ducks and cows would escape from the farm and come into our yard.  We would chase the animals back to the farm.  Disappointment filled the air when our moms called us in for supper because we knew that we wouldn’t see each other until the next day.

 

We also played at school during recess.  There was a huge playground.  There was a blacktop section for jump roping or Chinese jump rope.  A baseball field was also a part of the playground.  There were swings, seesaws, sliding boards, a merry-go-round, monkey bars and stationary bars for doing pull-ups and chin-ups.  Learning to take turns and negotiate were a big part of recess because several classes would be out at the same time.

Play is similar today in that there are opportunities for children to do the same kinds of things that we did as children.  Where I live now, I am glad to see children out riding their bikes or playing a game of kickball in the street.  They make hopscotch boards on the sidewalk.  Not all children have that same opportunity however.  Some of our Head Start children do not live in neighborhoods that are safe for play.  That is why I am glad that we have a playground when it’s nice outside and a gym for play when they cannot get outside to play.  Our classrooms have 30-45 minutes of outside play.  It is unstructured, but teachers help with problem solving ,as needed.

Play is different because many children are involved in at least one organized sports or other activity.   I sang in the choir and was in Girl Scouts.  That’s all there was as far as outside activity.  There are all kinds of technology to entertain children today.  We had transistor radios and a tv with four channels.  I do remember watching Captain Kangaroo.  I still remember and love the books that he used to read to us.

I think that it is important to continue with play throughout life.  For me, working in the garden, going for a walk, swimming at the pool, doing counted cross stitch, riding bikes with my grandchildren are ways of escaping the workaday world.  Being outside brings me a sense of peace.  It helps to relieve stress.  It also can help with decision making and problem-solving.  You just have time to think about anything or nothing at all.
I just read an article in AARP Bulletin about multigenerational playgrounds in Florida.  Grandchildren and their grandparents can do exercise in the same place and both benefit.  How cool is that!

References

Ginsberg, K. (2007, January). The Importance of Play in Pormoting Healthy Child Development

       and Maintaining Strong Parent-Child Bonds. Pediatrics, 119(1), 182 -191.  Retrieved from

       http://www.aap.org/pressroom/playfinal.pdf
Ramnarace, C. (2012, March). A Whole New 'Go Out and Play!'. AARP Bulletin, 53(2). 16-18

Relationship Reflection

Relationship Reflection

On the wall outside of a classroom this week:  "Relationships shape behavior not rules."

This is my mom.  She and I have always had a close relationship.  I am indebted to her for my faith and to the example she sets to try new things and to make a difference by doing all that I can to improve myself and make the world a better place.  We don’t always agree, but that is because we are similar in many ways.  We both love music, animals, cooking, gardening and hand work.  She has taught me perseverance and that I can do whatever I set my mind to do.

This is my husband, Bob.  We met after we had both finished college.  We have music and the love of reading in common.  We are very different as we look at how to handle things.  Because of that, we have learned a great deal from each other.  Our roles at this point have reversed.  He used to be very outgoing and wanting to relate to other people.  He was great with people during his 26 years in the ministry.  Now he is very quiet and prefers to be at home.  I used to be shy and learned from him how to relate to people and make them feel good about themselves.  Now I love being around other people.  The children that I work with help to keep my young and young at heart. I take my marriage vows very seriously.  My husband used to be the leader in our family.  Now it is my turn to be wife and caretaker to my husband.  This has taught me that relationships are constantly evolving.  We will be married for 33 years this summer.  We’re going to the beach with the children and grandchildren.

   This is my son, Thomas, his wife, Misty and our three grandchildren—Kimberly, Zach and Elizabeth.  Until I was a grandmother, I didn’t realize what a wonderful experience it is.  I only get to see them about once a month because they live an hour away and are very busy with their own lives.  Through my grandchildren I have learned that relationships are the most important thing.  No thing is as important as the love between people.  I have a lot of patience.  I am grateful for that as I interact with these three totally different children.  Because of them I have been taking better care of my health.  I would do anything I could do for them.  Thomas and Misty are great parents, and they complement each other.  Each has special gifts they bring to their relationship.  That is true of all relationships.  They all have value in their own way.

This is my daughter, Rebekah.  She is a very strong young woman.  She says that it is because of the example I have set.  We have been through a very trying time with my husband being very ill.  She has been very helpful as we have moved through this experience together.  I have learned to be more assertive through watching her strive to achieve her goals.  She is the director of activities at an assisted living facility.  She and I share the love of music and reading.  Rebekah has her dad’s sense of humor.  I appreciate good humor and see how it is useful in diffusing situations.  I am more serious, but have learned from her that life doesn’t have to always be serious.

 Jean is my best friend.  I also consider her my guardian angel.  We met 15 years ago while teaching at a private school.  She moved to Virginia from Rochester, NY.  We became almost immediate friends because we have a lot in common.  She helped me through my daughter’s teenage years.  She also has a very relaxed way of looking at life.  Jean has taught me that there is nothing to lose by taking chances.  I love her sense of humor.  She also helps me to not take life so seriously.  I appreciate her staying beside me as I dealt with my husband’s illness.  We love going to craft shows together, singing, ringing bells, and gardening.  Our husbands cringe when we go shopping together because we always spend more than we should.  I have learned from her that no matter what happens you can get through it.

This is Olivia, a true stereotypical cat.This is Lucy, our grandcat.  She is loaded with personality.  She likes her schedule to go a certain way.  Unfortunately, she has not liked graduate school at all because she hasn’t had the time in grandmother’s lap she would like.   She greets me each morning with a conversation and again when I come home in the afternoon.

 Olivia is a rescue cat that we found behind some bushes at a friend’s home.  She was severely underweight when we found her.  After six months with us, she decided to take a ride inside Rebekah’s car motor across Richmond.  She lived outside for 3 weeks before Rebekah spotted her at work.  We captured her and brought her home.  She was so grateful.  She has not tried to escape again.  From our cats I have learned that cats, like people can be very different.  I have to respect each one for who they are.

This is the group of people I work with every day.  Dr. Whitehead, on the far right, is my boss.  She is a great person to work for because she looks for the positive in every situation.  We have a great deal in common as well.  We both love music, and her husband is a minister.  We both have a heart for the children we serve.  Sometimes it can be heartbreaking.  She is my mentor because I have learned so much about being an administrator by working with her.  She has taught me the importance of getting buy in from all parties in a situation.  Beside her is Janet Harris, the health coordinator.  She arranges for all of our health screenings to be done and then follows up with the parents.  She is very straight forward.  I respect her for that.  She also is a child at heart.  Her favorite holidays at work are St. Patrick’s Day and Halloween.  She has as much fun as the children do on those days.  She has a Master’s Degree in business.  I have learned a great deal about getting all the facts and documenting everything from her.  The gentleman in the middle is our transportation coordinator and fatherhood specialist, Morris Randall.  He can be serious, but he prefers to be funny.  He has a gift for working with people.  He is very good at reading people.  He is also a pastor of a church in a community nearby.  We have to work closely together because the aides from my classroom also ride the bus with the children.  They also drive the bus if the bus driver is absent.  Next is our secretary, Claudette Whitaker.  She is like a mother to me.  She keeps telling me to work as long as I can.  Her husband is ill also so work is an outlet for her.  She is a very good writer and is the first face that our clients see.  Like me, she has had to refresh her Spanish because almost one third of our children are Latino.  Missing from the picture is Jennifer Jules-Best, who is the Family and Community Partnership Coordinator.  She brings a great deal of experience working with families.  She and her staff help the parents create goals for themselves.  We work closely together because she recruits the students that will go into my classrooms.  We are very different individuals, yet, we each are experts in our fields.  We respect each other’s gifts.    Like brothers and sisters, we get on each other’s nerves, but we still respect them for what they bring to the team.  Ultimately,  we all agree that what is best for the child and family is what we need to do.

There is one more relationship that is very important to me.  That relationship is my church family.  I have only been going to this church for 2 years, but it is so friendly I feel like I have been going for years.  I sing in the choir there.  It brings me great joy.  I direct 2 children's choirs.  As a choir director I am also on the Children's Ministry team and Worship team.  Right now I am in a small group studying the book The Journey.  It is about healing relationships that are broken.  I don't have a picture to show representing them.

In all relationships, trust is of utmost importance.  Communication is also key.  There has to be give and take.  Shared decision making helps to build trust in the relationship (Halgunseth, 2009).  Sensitivity to cultural difference is essential as well.  Listening is also important.  All of these are characteristics that support healthy relationships.  They can also be a challenge.  Finding staff who understand particular languages can be difficult.  Building trust takes hard work on everyone's part.  Taking time to listen is a skill that has to be developed.  Working together everyone benefits.

References

Halgunseth, L., Peterson, A., Stark, D., & Moodie, S. (2009). Family engagement, diverse families, and early childhood education programs: An integrated review of the literature. Retrieved from http://www.naeyc.org/files/naeyc/file/research/FamEngage.pdf